My Example

I find that I/we have made many mistakes in raising my/our children. Does anybody else besides me wish to be a better example to their children?

The more I read my Bible, the more I realize that I have such an awesome opportunity to raise my children to be godly adults/parents.

I want them to be used of God so much. I want to see them live victorious Christian lives and never turn their backs on God.

But...what does my life show them? What are my priorities? Are my words harsh, negative, critical, belittling, etc. or are my words loving, encouraging, uplifting, etc.?

I am learning that words are so important. The old saying when I was a kid I still hear kids say today: "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me!" That is one of the biggest lies!

I was called names growing up. Some of it was done in jest and some of it was done to be mean. I grew up believing that I wasn't loved. My feelings were hurt more times than I care to remember. And because of it I ended up harboring bitterness for many years in my life. I really believed that I was unworthy of any one's love and for many years I found myself amazed that someone had actually fallen in love with me and wanted to marry me and live the rest of his life with me. It took me a long time to admit I was bitter and to go to the person I was so offended at and make things right with them. I don't want my children to have to experience that EVER!

I still struggle today with acceptance. I find that I even struggle with God's love for me today because of things in my childhood (yes, I need to 'get over it'). It's hard to change thought patterns that were shaped in my mind as a child. I am very much a non-confrontational person today. I hate confrontation with a passion. I will do almost anything to avoid it. I tend to talk about 'safe' things with others and don't get too deep into opinions or personal matters. Have my children's thought patterns been shaped correctly? Do they struggle with God's love for them or do they embrace Him with every ounce of their being?

What about my actions? Do I portray the love of Christ to my kids and spend quality time with them or do I just brush them off and make them feel unimportant? Do I answer their questions rudely and with harshness or do I take the time to help them understand the answer in a way that shows they are important to me (even if I am tired or busy)?

What about discipline? How do I discipline my kids? Do I do it in love or do I scream at them and say things that are unnecessary and even hurtful? Do I show them from the Bible how they are wrong and how to correct their actions or do I throw my hands up in the air and give up trying to correct them?

How I have failed my children! I can't even count the number of times I've had to apologize to my kids because of my actions, words, wrong discipline, etc. But the Bible tells me that God's mercies endure forever and are renewed daily. With God's help, I know I can be a right example. God, help me to be the right example to my children!